Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Just high enough for therapy.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Randomize
