I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
