so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
