I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize