HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
