i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
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