So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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