Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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