Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
