Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Randomize
