Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Operation Purity has been aborted
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
