Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
