Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize