What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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