you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I cut my penus on the lid.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Randomize
