every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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