I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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