We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Randomize