i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
