hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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