I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
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