he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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