Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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