I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
My ass is underappreciated
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
