so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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