If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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