summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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