Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
