we're blogging at a bar
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
