Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I'm jealous of your bromance
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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