the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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