if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Do you still have your period?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize