After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
