if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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