TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Watching her eat just hurts me
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
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