You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
We smell like vodka and hangover
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize