i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
