STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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