Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
