Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize