if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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