They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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