She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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