i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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