hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
