no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
