I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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