We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
how drunk are you?
Several
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
