you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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