just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
